The Secret Nobody Keeps

As my little book nears the finish line, I am reminded how many lessons learned and words to live by are tucked into just about every chapter. In forty years, one learns a lot, sometimes without realizing it, sometimes with full awareness of the lesson. Here's one I have learned repeatedly in my life—first from my mother, who just spelled it out; second, from observing the actions of friends and acquaintances; and, finally, from my experience in the business world.

• Never, never lie. To anyone. If you do, the person you lie to, and anyone that person tells (and she will tell everyone in town) will never believe another word you say. Trust is fragile. It takes forever to build it and mere seconds to destroy it.

A few corollaries:

• It's a small world and an even smaller business world.
• Anything you say on line is out there forever, and anyone can access it.
• Whatever your reason, it's not good enough.

Finding New Meanings

Every experience has a lesson in it. The lesson might be startling, painful, ego deflating, or life altering. It could be a tiny aha moment or a giant revelation, but it always seems to be worth learning.

When one of my friends read my new book, Words To Live By, she got an entirely different meaning from the title than the one I had intended. I thought of the book as a memoir on how I earned my living; she thought of it as lessons learned during each phase of my career. When I viewed it in that light, I could see all the events and experiences that had shaped me as a person.